I remember everyone upon whom I've ever had a crush and I've had them for most of my life. I even remember the names of those who were the objects of my affections long before I was old enough even to know what crushes were. They started young, when I was preschool age. I had a thing for the little girl who lived down the street from me. Her name is Kelly. She is a year or two older than me. The name of the second person upon whom I had a crush is Genora. I was in kindergarten at that time.
At any rate, I was a poseur when I went through that whole "girls are yucky" phase that most little boys go through. I faked it. I never really believed it; I just didn't want teased. For as long as I've had crushes, I never told anyone of them about how I felt until I was way older. Embarassingly enough, it was not until after I had graduated from high school. I have been a strange mix of precosciousness and reticence growing up.