Montecristo Captain Quixote

montecristo

The World Line of the Horizon Star

Some would say I was a lost man in a lost world


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Montecristo Captain Quixote
montecristo

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"Everyone who has ever taken a shower has had an idea. It's the person who gets out of the shower, dries off, and does something about it that makes a difference."
- Nolan Bushnell

I just got back from going for a pizza. I walked around the corner (sans coat -- yea California) to this interesting joint named Rick's Pizza that I sometimes frequent. They have great music: Bob Dylan, Rush, The Rolling Stones etc. I had a pizza with sausage, onions, and mushroom and a couple of mugs of Fosters Lager and I'm feeling pretty good right about now. I walked back sniffing the chill night air and appreciating the neighborhood, probably the last time I'll get to do this. I've lived here for seven years. I will miss it.

I'm such a dichotomy. I like new things, and new experiences, but I hate closing chapters of my life. I am a creature of habit but enamored of possibilities. I dislike closing and locking doors behind me which can never be opened again because doing so closes off possibility -- and mortality is the eventual closing off of all possibility. Nevertheless, choosing possibilities and rejecting other alternatives is the only way that anything, even life itself, gets done. Perhaps it is that I most despise having such choices made for me, by circumstance. On the other hand, that is what life is about - the interplay among circumstances, choices and consequences. Independence and happiness, then, depend upon not focusing on circumstances, but rather upon which choices are available and what consequences arise from them. Unhappiness is the result of feeling oneself to be the prisoner of circumstances.

Changes
Yes

I’m moving through some changes
I’ll never be the same
Something you did touched me
There’s no one else to blame

The love we had has fallen
The love we used to share
We’ve given up pretending
As if you didn’t care

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

I look into the mirror
I see no happiness
All the warmth I gave you
Has turned to emptiness
The love we had has fallen
The love we used to share
You’ve left me here believing
In love that wasn’t there

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Word to the wise - well you get what’s coming
One word can bring you round
Changes

When I look into your eyes and try to find out how
There’s no way to save it now
And everything I feel
Changes
Keep looking for
Changes
Changes

For some reason you’re questioning why
I always believe it gets better
One difference between you and I
Your heart is inside your head

One word from you
One word from me
A clear design on your liberty
Who could believe when love has gone
How we move on like everyone

Only such fools
Only such jealous hearts

Only through love changes come

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

One road to loneliness
It’s always the same
One road to happiness
It’s calling your name

Change changing places - changes
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

Change changing places
Changes
Root yourself to the ground
Word to the wise - well you get what’s coming
One word - one word can bring you round
Changes

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Interesting, the 'new stuff/closing chapters dichotomy, not leastly because it's familiary. I try to just view it all as one on-going journey, a seemless whole, so that there is no stopping, there is no closing, there is no death of any part of me, there's just a place that's behind me on the road, which I can go back to visit if i choose. Of course, the word TRY is key there. :-P meh, I'm tired and this shift key doesn't wanna behave...

And, in the words of Mr. Bowie

Time may change me
But I can't trace time...



Re: And, in the words of Mr. Bowie

Indeed. Very appropos.

(Deleted comment)

Re: I like to not close doors when I exit rooms.

Sometimes you have no choice. The moving finger writes, and having written, moves on...

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