April 30th, 2015

King of Cups Captain Querent

Well no one told me about her though they all knew

Damn it, what part of me refuses to believe that she holds me in contempt, or worse, maybe doesn't care that she does? Hell, for that matter, why did I persist in chasing her in the first place anyway when she's been rejecting me and telling me that I'm unsuited for her since the beginning? What in the hell was it? Why am I still arguing with myself about this? Is it that hard to acknowledge to myself? It was plain text. It's not that I would have to worry about feeling worse to acknowledge it; I already do. The reality is what it is. Obviously, I just have to wait this out. Insight is slow, as is acceptance. I wish some of my parts would learn better, or faster.