Robert (Bro. Pepper-spray of Reasoned Discussion) (montecristo) wrote,
Robert (Bro. Pepper-spray of Reasoned Discussion)

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It is a dilemma friends!

I have a dilemma, oh friends and fellow readers of other people's business. I have been informed by e-mail that I am a winner in the ROYAL DUTCH SWEEPSTAKES/ INTERNATIONAL PROGRAMS held on 20TH December. 2002. Gee, if this is genuine, I will soon be worth $3.5 million United States, fiat-currency greenbacks! Is anyone reading this up for sailing, a cruise, or a trip or something? I'm so excited, and I don't even remember buying an entry for this lotto, which is really strange because as a rule, I never play lotteries. Fate is sure weird, isn't it. You know, at first when I received this, I was really skeptical. I mean, except for the header, (redacted) you'll notice that my name or address don't appear anywhere in the body of the message. On more reflection though, these people seem so sincere! I really think that they want me to have the money, and all I have to do to get it is just give them the number of my bank account and they'll just transfer it over to me in one lump sum! I just don't know what I should do, because I really don't remember buying into this lottery. What if they made a mistake and sent this notice to the wrong person? Would it be ethical to take the money anyway? What if I'm cheating some poor widow out of her lawful winnings? Could I really DO that? It is $3.5 million though -- should I give in to this rising temptation? I could be rich tomorrow! Don't believe me?

Here is the e-mail that was sent just to me three days ago.

From: Royal Dutch Lotto Promotion []
Sent: Thursday, October 09, 2003 1:06 PM
To: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Congratulations,you are a lotto Winner


REF: OYL /2551256003/22
BATCH: 14/0017/IPD

Attn: Sir


We are pleased to inform you of the announcement today, 11th, of
PROGRAMS held on 20TH December. 2002.Your company () attached to
ticket number 025-1146-1992-750, with serial number 2113-22 drew the
lucky numbers 13-15-22-37-39-43, and consequently won 
the lottery in the 3rd category. You have therefore been approved
for a lump sum pay out ofUS$3.5m in cash credited to file REF 
NO. OYL/2551256003/22.

This is from total prize of US$40,400,000.00 shared among the
seventeen international winners in this category. 
All participantswere selected through a computer ballot system
drawn form 15 million names from Australia, 
New Zealand, America, Europe and North America and Africa as part
of International Promotions Program,
which is conducted annually.


Your fund is now deposited with a Financial Institution insured
in yourname. Due to the mix up of some numbers 
and names, we ask that you keep this award strictly from public
notice until your claim has been processed and your
money remitted to your account.

This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming 
orunscrupulous acts by participants of this program. 
We hope with a part of you prize, you will participate in our end
of year high stakesUS$5.5 billion International Lottery. To begin
your claim, please contact Our 

Foreign Service Payment 
Director Dr Erol Bihorac
E mail:

For due processing andremittance of your prize to a designated
account of your choice.Be categorically inform that any necessary
obligation/requirement should be met by individuah beneficiary
towards remmitance of your fund to your account.

Remember, all prize money must be claimed not later than 10th
October 2003. After this date, all funds will be returned as

NOTE: In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, 
please remember to quote your reference and batch numbers
in every one of your correspondences with your agent.
Furthermore, shouldthere be any change of your address, do
inform your claims agent as soon as possible.

Congratulations again from all our staff and thank you for being
part of our promotions program.


Mr Steve Volk.
The Promotion Manager

N.B. Any breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners
will result to disqualification.

sorry for the late information Thanks

Mr Steve Volk.

Okay, so now the Dutch have joined the game. How quaint. Where do these clowns get my e-mail address? Fortunately, it's the address of an account that is being moved to a new one, thanks to cable system corporate buyouts. Most of the time my real e-mail accounts don't get bombed with spam. I actually get very little. This one account though, is really a target for con-jobs from overseas. I still don't know why it should be this one and not others. This isn't even my Hotmail account, which is the one I give whenever I have to do business with any anonymous commercial site. You'd think that anyone with the talent, time and energy to dream up these things would have a legitimate job, wouldn't you.

Frankly, to be a critic here for a moment, I find this e-mail attempt to be interesting. The approach is long on explanation and official looking wording and layout. The verisimilitude is striking as well. Clearly, these guys have more time on their hands than the Nigerians, although I definitely find the Nigerian scams much more charming, with their broken English, and more personal human-interest approach: "I got you address from you local Chamber of Commerce, as they were recommend you as a moral and discreet person." [sic]

Yes, the Nigerians are certainly staying on top of things. I have heard that scam e-mails have overtaken oil as the country's chief export! It really is inspiring to see such ambition and hard work on the part of the Nigerians -- they even have their own international convention! Perhaps the Dutch fellows above could look into it. Maybe they will come home with a few useful insights. I think the Third World has quite a bit to teach the European Union -- if only they would listen.


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