Robert (Bro. Pepper-spray of Reasoned Discussion) (montecristo) wrote,
Robert (Bro. Pepper-spray of Reasoned Discussion)
montecristo

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Free at last! Free at last!

Let the joyous news be spread...The Wicked Old Witch at last is wed!
Someone dropped a spouse on her!
Ah! Shine, sweet freedom. The ex got herself hitched yesterday. Best wishes, Dear, and congratulations to the object of your affections. You've finally done the right thing.

Some might think that I wish my ex ill. Actually, nothing could be further from the truth. I'm truly happy for her. Let's hope she finally got it right this time, and that this sticks, if not just for her sake then at least for the children. It's a good thing. Despite our differences and what has gone down between us, she deserves the happiness she's able to secure for herself. She has many lovely and wonderful qualities, and I did love her dearly, despite what went down in our relationship. Maybe she'll find some stability. Everybody needs that, and I used to fear that she'd never have it. Sometimes, it is not only good, but a relief to be wrong.

The only difference I have with the woman is that she dinged me for spousal support, as if I owed her a refund on our lives together, after what she did. Well, that was a sting to my pride I do admit -- I even offered her more in child support to drop the spousal support, so nettlesome did I find that demand. As usual, she dug in her heels and stuffed her fingers in her ears. Cutting off her nose to spite her face is a favored tactic of hers. Heh. Now it's gone anyway, and I'm a few hundred a month better off and with more maneuvering room to get my house in order. It's a good thing. The divorce was very frustrating to me, like an itch I couldn't scratch.

It's also another kind of relief as well. For at least part of the time since she left, I have been worrying that her new "situation" would not work out and that she'd show up on my doorstep, my daughters in tow and I was terribly worried that I'd not be able to take them in while turning her away -- and I certainly would have needed to do that. We are not good for one another anymore, for whatever reason, if we ever were. I took her back twice before in our lives, and I don't regret that, really, but the third time would not be the charm. I think that I was a bit cutting and nasty in my dealings with her at times since she left, and perhaps I was attempting to convince myself that I needed to disabuse her of any possible regrets or changes of heart. More than likely, I was wrong to do that, as it wasn't necessary, in dubious hindsight. Maybe she's owed an apology for that, but I suspect that we're even, and I don't feel like negotiating with her over anything. A truce is fine with me. Certainly I have found this process rather painful and excruciatingly frustrating. It will be good to regard the woman as a fond, distant acquaintance, at last.

Now, it's a moot point. She is not my problem anymore. This is a profound relief to me. This break feels cleanly final, at long last. I needed my life back. She got her divorce in April of 2004 -- this one is all mine, at long last. As eithnepdb says, in a link from her bio page, "I do closure."

Tags: exuberance, family and friends
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